…To the ones who desire a great life
4 ways to overcome online blues
It’s hard to be online these days. SO HARD!
You have a few hours to spare from having responsibilities or you are just exhausted or even discombobulated with where you are in your life. You pick up your phone to check what’s happening in the social media sphere with the hope of stumbling upon a tweet or Instagram picture or post that might make your day feel less blue. There you are scrolling through socialville and you see a tweet that says:
@SistaThatcher: “Only 1 month down into 2020 and I have knocked out 4 of the items on my bucket list”,
Or “10 trips in one month. 2020 is good to me.”
Or” I finally got the scholarshipl. #2020MustObey”
And there you are wondering if your village people have finally gotten a hold of your destiny because it seems everyone else around you (sometimes those close to you) are getting showered with new year blessings and for some odd reason, you’ve been skipped. uncertain of what the year has in store for you. . Your new year’s resolution was to be your best in whatever you do but even that ‘best’ seems questionable these days. Your reason for coming on social media to ease off tension has unfortunately made your BP skyrocket. Sorry, dear.
I get it. We all get that pressure. No matter how much we deny it to our friends, there are times when “5 seconds of jealousy” hits and the moment you ask yourself questions your mom would ask when you came fourth position but your best friend came first in school (if you were raised in a typical Nigerian household): “Does your X have two heads… Answer me?” Moments you soliloquize the #GodWhen because your pride won’t let you say it in public. To be honest, it’s ok to feel this way. You are not crazy at all. Naa… far from it. It shows how human you are and that’s fine too.
Truth is, the pressure is inevitable. As a matter of fact, as long as there is social media, the pressure continues to intensify. We all just need to find a coping mechanism, a method of figuring out life as we deal with the pressure…and that’s where I come in.
I call them “5 ways to get out of the social media blues”.
1. Breathe. As mundane as this might sound, taking deep breaths can have a powerfully positive impact on our mental strength. According to researchers from the University of Michigan on the importance of breathing in Yoga, taking deep breaths helps to increase our energy level. One of the reasons you probably feel the blues is probably due to your low energy level. So, go ahead. Breathe in…Breathe out. Do it again. And again. Now, how do you feel?
2. Show gratitude: Another cliché however, based on personal experience, I have seen how deep breaths and just being grateful for the ‘little things’ mitigates the social media blues. For one, I decided a few years ago to write a letter to a minimum of 5 people who had an impact in my life, one way or another — positive or negative. (I believe in learning from critics and ‘haters’, however that’s another conversation for another day). Every year, I send a letter telling them how grateful I am for their role in my life / my year and in return, I get replies from people who lift my spirit. And for moments when the blues come, I pick up those reminders and they help soothe my soul. I am just plain grateful for the little things — like the job I have, considering there’s a plethora of people I know who need jobs and would do almost anything to have mine. I’m grateful for family, for the days when I want something and can afford it (oh… the bliss). Are you still with me?
3. Take A Digital Detox / Be Creative: Remember all those things you once did before social media hit the scene? Remember those ideas you have that make your heart tingle? Remember those activities you’ve always wanted to try? Do them. I like to take a ‘digital detox’ and immerse myself in non-digital activities. I often love to hang out with myself and explore places -visit farms, go wine tasting, eat good food, attend cultural events and recently, I joined a painting party and a salsa class until Corona happened. Interestingly, engaging more with people has helped me stay off the social media blues, share my awesomeness with real humans and importantly, become more grateful for life. It doesn’t have to be a digital detox for you; it could be playing chess online or learning to cook even better, or taking a Masterclass course. Just do something different from scrolling through your timeline. OK?
4. Find your tribe; Love ’em Hard: Research continues to show that we are social beings. Hence our reason for being on social media in the first place is to connect with people, right? Finding your tribe matters- they could be work colleagues or the people you meet while you are doing the things you love. They’re the people you click with; the people you don’t have to be anybody but yourself with; the people who you would be unashamed to be vulnerable with and share information about the things that both excite and scare you. Once you find them, hold on to them and love ’em hard. The question now becomes, how do you find them?
Do you think I’ll spill all the tea right now?
